This post is different. It isn’t full of sunshine or sparkles. It won’t tell you how to make the perfect crafty decoration for your perfectly maintained home or how to save your money without feeling the pinch of budgeting or make you feel badly for preparing dinner from a box when you were just too dog tired to do anything else. My perfect children won’t make you feel like your parenting is lacking or something must be wrong with you. You know why? Because today I decided that , come what may, I am going to be real.
I haven’t blogged at all in months. I tried. I thought about it many times. The post ideas that I thought of that seemed “right” and on theme with my blog of being natural, frugal, and happy just felt all wrong to me. The little blurbs about a free sample of some product to send for, a way to save money, or a cutesy craft felt shallow and hypocritical because in reality, I haven’t been very thrifty. I have done very few art projects compared to what I used to and I haven’t even painted my kitchen walls in the year I have lived in this house. My house isn’t spotless and I am not wonderwoman. But, you know what, I am not complaining. There is nothing shameful with being imperfect or with sometimes making mistakes. In the blog world it is SO easy to see the shiny side of everyone else. After all, the only side of a blogger that we see is what they choose to share. The same holds true for Facebook and other social media. If you don’t want to share your shortcomings, you don’t need to.Sometimes that is nice because you can be the best you possible, the you that you want to be anyways. Nobody need ever know that you burnt dinner last night or that your laundry pile is so huge you can’t find 2 socks that match today. But along with that benefit comes the fact that strong, competent, amazing women don’t feel like they measure up. And that is not ok with me. So, here I am , admitting for everyone to see that I am far from perfect (everyone who actually knows me is nodding, smiling and agreeing).
I love the fact that we can encourage each other by what we post and share online. There are thousands of resources available for us with the typing of just a few words into Google…recipes, crafts, fashions, fixes for about any problem we can come up with. The downside is that perfectly normal women end up feeling like LESS. They feel like they don’t measure up or that they should have tried harder. Women who raise children with love and security feel like their parenting is falling short. Women whose bodies have carried and nurtured babies want to cover their beauty because it doesn’t look like that model who isn’t really that thin anyways.I am not only talking about Hollywood. We all know that those “stars” aren’t realistic and that their lives are often in shambles because they spend so much time keeping up appearances. What is needling me is that we can sign on the web and find blog after blog of women who are supposed to be just like us who are only presenting their best side. I have been guilty of that, and maybe you have too. We don’t want to complain or seem discouraging, so we don’t share the struggles. But you know, it’s OK to feel discouraged once and awhile. It’s alright to be REAL and to admit that people have problems. It doesn’t make us less because we admit it, it makes us stronger. There exists such potential to uplift one another through our comments and our posts, but there is also an opportunity to conceal and compare. I whole heartedly give you permission to come talk to me and be exactly who you are. God doesn’t turn away in disgust when we fall short, so why should be do that to ourselves? He lifts us up, brushes off and sets us back on the path. So do true friends. How much better could we make the internet if we are more like that?
I have come to a place in my life where I just need to be ME. It may be considered shallow, wrong, negative, or any number of things, but from here on out this is the real me. I want a place to share my life, my joys,my triumphs, my happiness, but also a place where I can be open when the sky just looks grey. This blog has been silent because I haven’t been sure how to put myself into it…and without that, it seems to be useless. So, in the future , things around here will be real. I may loose every single reader because it may change into something that nobody finds useful. But, I will be here. My goals, my failings, my successes, my random ramblings, and my honesty. I want to share with you all, but it has to be genuine. So, feel free to step back from my blog if you want, but I prefer you to stick around and be real with me.